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Discussion Starter #1
I just had my second run-in with the law. Both times it's been the Bates City (pop 199) cops too. I was in their trailer (for an unrelated reason) a few days back, and saw the duty roster on the white board. These idiots have 14 officers on rotation! And yet you never see one of the silly bastards on the road when you need one.

Except for last week. It was strongly suggested to me that I ought to have a front licence plate on my car (Missouri, the Otherwise Perfect State). Pointing out that half the people here run around with out front plates, and a few even lack rear plates, was to no avail.

Fortunately, I have the front plate holder for the Stealth.

Unfortunately, it's an ugly piece of crap.

What has anybody else done to make the front licence plate less visually offensive (and hanging it on the garage wall is no longer an valid answer)?
 

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Brian Boytano? Andrew, did they catch you in stretchy pants and a sparkly shirt again! LOL! You know, those small town cops don't go for that sort of thing!
 
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you just need some hydraulics......have the plate concealed...but when the cops pull up behind you tap a hidden switch....out pops your front plate....when the cops say you don't have a front plate place them under citizens arrest for driving under the influence
 

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Diablo, that's a reference to South Park. And I think Brian Boytano would kick the sh!t outta those hippie-ass-bitches!


EricB
gotta get the movie...
 

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Do what Brian B. would do...Put your plates in the front windshield. Maybe you should get Lionel Hutz to fight your case?

What i did was find a license plate holder that was just that, a license holder. No fancy car dealershit plate holder or one with some clever phrase.
Just a thought to keep from being harrased.

[This message has been edited by Space Coyote (edited December 27, 1999).]
 

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Although Multicast has a much better idea than me! The hydraulics would be pretty Brian Boytano esque.
 

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Or you could move to a state that has cool looking license plates that match the color of your car. That's what Brian would do!

Be glad we don't live over seas with those three foot plates.
 

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Have to see that movie, cuz that one went way over my head! I was thinking of the figure skater!
 

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Discussion Starter #9
Diablo, it's out on video now. Only 80 minutes long, but it'll pay for itself since you're going to watch it four times anyway. I'd like to get me one of those "Blame Canada" T-shirts, the maple leaf with the red line through it.

Some guy did his best to transcribe the soundtrack. Check out http://www.geocities.com/SunsetStrip/Balcony/3252/southpark/SouthPark.htm. You'll find the text to the Brian song there.

Our spellings of Boytano disagree, but, then, I'm not a fag who watches figure skating, so this other guy is probably correct.

(And the quick ones among you out there are already wondering "hmm, then just what kind of fag *is* he?")

SpaceCoyote - can you elaborate on the difference between a plate holder and the dealer's plate bracket?
 

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When i got my car there was a simple piece of metal screwed into the the front bumper, the plate then screws into the holder (all you see is the License Plate no black borders or cheap chrome holder).
The Dealer plate holder i was referring to is one of those (cheap chrome holders) that has the dealership's name on the top of it, ie. "Space Coyote Mitsubishi". I have also seen college alumni plate holders, you know what i'm talking about. Is this what you were looking for? I don't recall what comes on the front of Stealths.
 

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Discussion Starter #11
Yeah, that's what I figured, but I just had to be sure.

I have the factory mount, which is invisible from the front, and only the plate and the two ugly screws show, although the plate holder is quite visible from the top and sides. In any case, it ruins the look of the car.

I can't think of any way of mounting the plate without it being ugly, but I'm not an arts student, so I have no imagination. I was just hoping that somebody had figured out a nice way of keeping the cops happy without destroying the good looks of a '91 Stealth.

Possibly less annoying, but certainly much more drastic and expensive, would be to cut a plate-shaped rectangular hole in the middle of the plastic nose of the car, right behind where the plate sits now and just above the air intakes, and recess the plate in there, and cover it with a curved piece of clear plexiglass that has the same shape as the piece of nose that was removed. This would only work, though, if the nose is hollow, and doesn't have some metal bumper or something behind it.
 

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First come up with a good personalized plate and then it won't seem to bad. I had the same problem a couple years back with my TA but I have been running for about 3 years in Washington without. When I get pulled over I just tell them someone must have stolen it again and then put it on for a while. On my 85 TA it had a little larger nose so I ended up having a almost exact copy of my original air brushed on. I had a little smoke coming out of the top of Mt. Rainier. (nice touch) I had one cop notice it when he was checking my tabs after getting pulled over for speeding. It was funny, he did not notice it until he looked at it from an angle then he had to touch it. He started stuttering saying you can't do that! I told him it is exactly the same as the back and is not deceptive in any way and I have had my other one stolen before then I have to drive without. I said try to steel that one. He liked it and I didn't even get my ticket. Just come up with something creative.
 

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Well, the man DID say he wasn't creative...

Andrew, it really is a damn shame that those doughnut chewers are "strongly suggesting" that you deface your car like that. I'm still patiently waiting for Ontario to get rid of theirs... great way for the gov't to reduce costs... why not?

Anyways, my suggestion is to mount it to the black plastic piece that hangs below the front fascia. It may get bent if you go bombing over curbs, but it'll be there, and largely out of sight. But, it will still visible enough that the local constabulary can stuff it if they have anything to say.

Plan B is the hydraulic system.

I don't know what plan C is, but don't put the plate in your front window! I had to do that with my '84 Charger 2.2 when I smashed the front nose piece on the guard rail at Harwood Ave on the 401 (I lost a fight with a deep rut in the slush.) The reflection of the plate in the window drove me bananas, and it looked just plain tacky.
Just for the record, I drove for a couple of weeks without it, back and forth to Scarborough every day, (46 klicks 1 way) and wasn't harrassed.

I think the good ole boys in Bates City need a real job.
 

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I just saw a little ricer that put his plate in the top right side of his windshield and put some fancy sticker where his plate was supposed to be. See that idea isn't so uncool!
 

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I hate it that the cops make us put those plates on the front! The cars are so much more beautiful without it, and the dang plate bracket is 30 bucks! Thats money i could be using for fun stuff, or in the case of our cars, a tank of gas! I am still going without one, until they "Strongly Suggest" a second time.

Brian
91 stealth ES
 

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Discussion Starter #16
My first plan was to simply take a different (albeit somewhat longer) route home, and avoid Bates City altogether. That way' I'd avoid having the same cop see me again, and avoid forcing him to take action. To his credit, he *was* being a nice guy, but a "strong suggestion" the first time will no doubt be a "ticket" the second time if I blatantly taunt him. Unfortunately, my alternate route has been freshly tarred and gravelled, so that's out.

I thought about taping it to the back of the passenger-side sun visor. That way, when going through Bates City and risking a confrontation, I could just pop the visor down. But I checked out the state's web site, and read the plate law myself. Alas, the language is clear and unambiguous - plate has to go on the front of the vehicle (so bang goes the sun visor idea) and must be 8 to 40 inches off the ground (and bang goes the air dam mount idea).

For guys in Ontario, check the OHTA. Nowhere does it say where your plates must be mounted. You could keep your plates in the trunk, and still be in compliance. I had a front one fall off one January, and I figured I'd put it back in in May or so, when the temperature wasn't still absolute zero. OPP asshole pulls me over the same day, gives me a ticket. I read the OHTA section he cited, and it says nothing about where to mount the plates. Took the ticket to the JP, who told me that I was a stupid idiot, then spent 10 minutes flipping through his copy of the Act, getting madder and madder, til he finally ripped up the ticket.
 
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