I'll try and keep this short. My high school is completely infested with swarms of ricers. For every normal car that I see idling outside, there's at least 4 monstrosities with falling apart ground effects and fake hood scoops. Well on with the funny stuff. I was outside 5th period yesterday on the front steps covering my ears from the deafening sound of bumblebees as some retarded racing "crews" reved at each other. Not even about to race, just parked and double parked along the street making feeble honduh noises. All of a sudden a beautiful bright yellow Viper

comes tearing down the street, braking at the corner. Both windows are down and the passenger looks at one of the rice burners and openly laughs and points. Of course the owner was pissed. "Yo why you laughin at my sh*t for? " "Because it's a piece of crap, man!" "Yo f**k you ni**a, you wanna run? My boy got dem turbos yo!" The viper guy says "Alright lets see what ya got" and backs up and parks. The ricer pulls out his silver cellphone with all the necessary blinking lights and noises and dials up his friend. "Yo wut up man. Yeah come around the front son yo we got a challenge." Apparently these morons didn't know jack about vipers. As he waits for his friend to arrive, the ricer starts insulting the viper driver. "Yo I heard those was mad slow. My boy beat one upstate on da highway. You gonna get wrecked!" I hear a loud angry bee rattling noise and warping, cheap subs pounding from down the street. "Yo here he comes now." I look to my right and what do I see? A del sol painted sky blue with it's headlights on at 1:00 in the afternoon. Huge combat wing, dropped so ridiculously and with black rims. And goddamned if I heard a BOV anywhere

. It's also going like 50 in a school zone. As it approaches the school it doesn't slow down. The ricer is now waving at his friend. "Yo over here yo!" I could hear the driver let off the gas and the car was coasting still going very fast. And now there's a car that pulled out on that side of the street blocking his path. And a van parked in the opposite lane. I wonder why he isn't slowing down, there is about 30 feet left to the car in the road. Well he keeps coming fast, slowing slightly because he isn't using the gas but obviously not using any brakes

. "Is this guy THAT stupid?" I thought? I got the answer to that in about 1.5 seconds. Still going about 30, the guy flys past the school, and I suddenly realise there's going to be an accident. There's no way he can stop in time and there's NO WHERE to swerve, both lanes are blocked! As he whizzes past his car begins to turn right and it's headed RIGHT FOR the ricer who called him up on the cellie

. The ricer starts to run like mad, and a second later, the del sol with it's system still blasting completely SMASHES into the original ricer's vehicle, driver's side

. Huge crunching noise and people scatter as the del sol crumples, as does the other car. What's left of the del sol scrapes to a stop a few feet down, close to the viper, making sparks. There are metal and glass pieces all over the street. Both vehicles are completely wrecked. the del sol now has no passenger side and the civic has been knocked a good 30 degrees around and completely ruined the driver's side, from the doors to the hood. The viper dudes are stunned. Jaws open

. A few seconds later they peel away and dissapear. The ricer is now running over to the del sol's carcass. Miraculously, the door opens and a very very scared ricer stumbles out, completely disoriented, shaking. Cops were on the scene in minutes, and the del sol's owner mumbled something about "no brakes".. hahaha. Today in school there was an announcement that the accident had been caused by someone cutting a brake fluid line and if we had any knowledge of who was responsible to contact the principal immediately. Hah. If I ever find out who did that I'll be giving them a medal. And yes this really happened, I haven't exaggerated at all. Now tell me that wasn't funny. I am still laughing at this moment, I cannot believe I witnessed what I did.